What Sunday's "Survival Run" Taught Me About Myself

I learned a lot about myself this Sunday on our 10 mile run. What started off as a great run quickly turned into a potential train wreck. Here is how it went down...

Mile 1: paced at 8:05 per mile...felt good

Mile 2: paced at 8:08 per mile...still feeling pretty good

Mile 3: paced at 8:22 per mile...starting to see the upper register heart rate

Mile 4: paced at 8:34 per mile...heart rate steady at 175 bpm...which is too high...I like to stay around 165 bpm on longer runs.

Mile 5: paced at 8:50 per mile...wheels starting to come off...heart rate 175-179 bpm and perceived exertion is way up there. I almost threw up twice.

Miles 6-8: paced at 9:37 per mile... heart rate is now off the chain at 180-190 bpm. I'm only 31...so you can figure my estimated max heart rate is only 189. Almost threw up 2-3 times between miles 6-8. 

This is where God started teaching me about myself. My first temptation was to stop. Ken even asked me, near mile 7, if I needed to stop. I really had to fight to keep going. My lack of time in high humidity was really making my breathing difficult. Seeing average paces of 9:40, 9:58, 10:05, etc on my Garmin became really frustrating. 

My next move was to pull my headphones out and start listening to my breathing in hopes of establishing rhythm. This brought my heart rate down to around 178...music can ramp up your heart rate if it's fast and heavy. I also started praying for God to show me something about myself in my struggles. I tell my clients all the time, your character will start to show under stress, strain, and suffering...this is true in life and in exercise.  Exercise is a great way to reveal character and what is buried deep at your core. So as I prayed over that 20-25 minute period, I learned about a few character flaws...

1. I wanted to make excuses. I tried to give myself "an out" due to the humidity, the fact we started to0 fast, my asthma, etc. If I was willing to make excuses then...I'd be willing to make excuses when life became challenging. I just had to put on my armor and go to battle against the excuses.

2. I wanted to complain. I started to yell out to Ken, who was about a block ahead of me, "this sucks dude" but I didn't. However, I was quickly reminded that complaining would not make things any easier. Again...if I do it on a 10 mile run that would be over in less than 90 min...I'd do it day in day out when the stresses of life are present. 

3. I wanted to break a commitment I made.  I told myself that whatever happens and however bad my pace gets, I am not stopping. I thought about stopping 1-2 times when my heart rate was reaching 190 bpm. I needed the character victory, so with God's blessing, I kept pressing on. I can't remember the last time I stopped on a long run...but I was really close that day. 

Mile 9-9.9: somehow pulled out a 8:35 aver pace on the last miles plus. Maybe it was a second wind...who knows. 

So, I finished the run at an average pace of 8:56...which was really sad compared to the 8:15 and 8:20 we were putting up on 7 and 8 miles runs in the month of May. However, I am extremely grateful to be able to learn and work on the parts of my character that break down under stress.

If you don't take yourself to that place in your workout, where you are tempted by "the dark side" of your personality...I'd highly recommend it. You will be better for it...trust me!